Song of the Week

"C.S. Lewis Song"

If I find in myself desires nothing in this world can satisfy,
I can only conclude that I was not made for here.
If the flesh that I fight is at best only light and momentary,
then of course I'll feel nude when to where I'm destined I'm compared.

Speak to me in the light of the dawn.
Mercy comes with the morning.
I will sigh and with all creation groan as I wait for hope to come for me.

Am I lost or just less found? On the straight or on the roundabout of the wrong way?
Is this a soul that stirs in me, is it breaking free, wanting to come alive?
'Cause my comfort would prefer for me to be numb
And avoid the impending birth of who I was born to become.

Speak to me in the light of the dawn.
Mercy comes with the morning.
I will sigh and with all creation groan as I wait for hope to come for me.

For we, we are not long here...
Our time is but a breath, so we better breathe it.
And I, I was made to live, I was made to love, I was made to know you.
Hope is coming for me...
Hope, He's coming...

Speak to me in the light of the dawn.
Mercy comes with the morning.
I will sigh and with all creation groan as I wait for hope to come for me...

Still?

Well,

It's late. Past midnight. So I guess it's officially March 21, 2010 (Happy 1st Anniversary to Patrick and Lauren Smalley!!!).

But that's not why I'm writing. Sorry guys. I do love y'all.

No, what's really got me up is the fact that after more than 10 months of not being in Spain, my heart is aching painfully to be there.

I don't mean to sound depressed. I'm not at all. I know I'm in Auburn for a reason, and the Lord has blessed me with so many things here. I do love it.

It's just that, I don't know, I felt so at home in Spain. With my host family, with my awesome Spanish friends, in my Spanish church, living in the gorgeous city that is Valencia. I probably think and dream as much in Spanish as I do in English these days.

I do try not to think about it, but I can't seem to go a single day without my thoughts wandering to that place and those people.

Why do I long for it like this?

I wish I had an answer to that question. One key to contentment is to never picture yourself in any other circumstances than those in which you presently find yourself. Isn't that exactly what I'm NOT doing when I desire Spain?

I won't deny, part of it has to do with the stark contrast between my life free of responsibility in Spain to that of rigorous schedule and demands here in Auburn. Yeah, there's something appealing about that.

But my ultimate conclusion is that I'm a Spaniard at heart :)

And tonight, I'm really struggling with being here and not there.

SIFAT

AHHHHH!!!!

I'm still in the freaking-out stage, but I just found out about an hour ago that I've been offered a counselor position for this summer at SIFAT! That OF COURSE I'm going to accept!

I applied last month, and have been anxiously awaiting this news ever since. There are 4 girl and 4 guy counselors, out of a whole lot of applicants, and I feel SO blessed, beyond any words I could muster, to have been appointed by the Lord to this high calling!

SIFAT, Servants In Faith And Technology, is a missions organization that, throughout the year, hosts leaders from third-world nations and teaches them how to use different technologies to effectively alleviate some of the greatest problems they face - lack of clean water, food, efficient power sources, etc. They are committed to sharing God's love in practical ways.

During the summers, they host youth groups, at their campus in Lineville, AL, and teach practical ways to serve where the Lord has called us to - in our everyday lives.

I fell in love with SIFAT when our college ministry took a retreat there in January. Their heart is SO outwardly focused. They are 100% obsessed with God and his glory and self-forgetfulness! It's the best and I cannot WAIT to spend my summer with them!

I'll be posting more about SIFAT, I'm sure, as I walk through the coming preparation stages.

YAY!!!!

Love Day

God knew everything about us, all our sins and dirtiness and failures included, before we even existed. And He still chose to create us.

That is love.

He called my name before the foundations of the Earth, for nothing that I've done, but because He is good and always seeks His glory.

That is love.

He calls us to follow Him, to find our identity in Him, because our lives divorced from Him are worthless and ineffective.

That is love.

He has a plan for our lives, that works for our good.

That is love.

He promises to never leave us or forsake us, and there is never a time where we have to do anything on our own.

That is love.

Love never gives up.

Love cares more for others than for self.

Love doesn't want what it doesn't have.

Love doesn't strut or have a swelled head.

It doesn't force itself on others,

Isn't always, "me first,"

Doesn't fly off the handle,

Doesn't keep score of the sins of others,

Doesn't revel when others grovel,

But takes pleasure in the flowering of truth.

It puts up with anything,

Trusts God always,

Always looks for the best,

And never looks back but keeps going to the end.

We have all sinned and fallen short of God, but He demonstrates His love for us, that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. That is the ultimate act of Love. He became sin who knew no sin that we might become His righteousness.

Hallelujah, Perfect Love!

And what has He called us to do?

Love the Lord our God with all of our heart, all of our mind, all of our soul, and all of our strength.

And

Love our neighbors as ourselves.

Today is a great day to recognize Love.

Now let's spend the rest of our lives actively pursuing it!

The Vision

Here's a poem by Peter Greig.

So this guy comes up to me and says:
“What’s the vision? What’s the big idea?”
I open my mouth and words come out like this:
The vision?
The vision is JESUS – obsessively, dangerously, undeniably Jesus.

The vision is an army of young people.
You see bones? I see an army.
And they are FREE from materialism.

They laugh at 9-5 little prisons.
They could eat caviar on Monday and crusts on Tuesday.
They wouldn’t even notice.
They know the meaning of the Matrix, the way the west was won.

They are mobile like the wind, they belong to the nations.
They need no passport.
People write their addresses in pencil and wonder at their strange existence.
They are free yet they are slaves of the hurting and dirty and dying.

What is the vision?

The vision is holiness that hurts the eyes.
It makes children laugh and adults angry.
It gave up the game of minimum integrity long ago to reach for the stars.
It scorns the good and strains for the best.
It is dangerously pure.

Light flickers from every secret motive, every private conversation.
It loves people away from their suicide leaps, their Satan games.
This is an army that will lay down its life for the cause.
A million times a day its soldiers choose to loose,
that they might one day win
the great ‘Well done’ of faithful sons and daughters.

Such heroes are as radical on Monday morning as Sunday night. They don’t need fame from names. Instead they grin quietly upwards and hear the crowds chanting again and again: “COME ON!”

And this is the sound of the underground
The whisper of history in the making
Foundations shaking
Revolutionaries dreaming once again
Mystery is scheming in whispers
Conspiracy is breathing…
This is the sound of the underground

And the army is discipl(in)ed.
Young people who beat their bodies into submission.
Every soldier would take a bullet for his comrade at arms.
The tattoo on their back boasts “for me to live is Christ and to die is gain”.

Sacrifice fuels the fire of victory in their upward eyes.
Winners. Martyrs.
Who can stop them?
Can hormones hold them back?
Can failure succeed?
Can fear scare them or death kill them?

And the generation prays

like a dying man
with groans beyond talking,
with warrior cries, sulphuric tears and
with great barrow loads of laughter!
Waiting. Watching: 24 – 7 – 365.

Whatever it takes they will give: Breaking the rules. Shaking mediocrity from its cosy little hide. Laying down their rights and their precious little wrongs, laughing at labels, fasting essentials. The advertisers cannot mould them. Hollywood cannot hold them. Peer-pressure is powerless to shake their resolve at late night parties before the cockerel cries.

They are incredibly cool, dangerously attractive

Inside.

On the outside? They hardly care.
They wear clothes like costumes to communicate and celebrate but never to hide.
Would they surrender their image or their popularity?
They would lay down their very lives – swap seats with the man on death row – guilty as hell. A throne for an electric chair.

With blood and sweat and many tears, with sleepless nights and fruitless days,
they pray as if it all depends on God and live as if it all depends on them.

Their DNA chooses JESUS. (He breathes out, they breathe in.)
Their subconscious sings. They had a blood transfusion with Jesus.
Their words make demons scream in shopping centres.

Don’t you hear them coming?

Herald the weirdo's! Summon the losers and the freaks.
Here come the frightened and forgotten with fire in their eyes.
They walk tall and trees applaud, skyscrapers bow, mountains are dwarfed by these children of another dimension.
Their prayers summon the hounds of heaven and invoke the ancient dream of Eden.

And this vision will be.
It will come to pass;
it will come easily;
it will come soon.

How do I know?

Because this is the longing of creation itself,
the groaning of the Spirit,
the very dream of God.

My tomorrow is his today.
My distant hope is his 3D.
And my feeble, whispered, faithless prayer invokes a thunderous, resounding, bone-shaking great 'Amen!' from countless angels, from heroes of the faith, from Christ himself. And he is the original dreamer, the ultimate winner.

Guaranteed.

Jimmy Needham, I need him! :)

Going back to my roots, here's a musical artist you may or may not have heard. Jimmy Needham.

My precious friend Jordan Lee and I were studying together Wednesday night at AK's Coffee, which, for those of you who don't know, is a Christian owned coffee shop. A lot of the music they play is by Christian artists. So we sit down to study but are immediately distracted by this amazing man singing to us about God's love being a hurricane. Like the dedicated students we are, we instantly begin searching the web to identify our mystery musician. We kept trying to liken him to other artists with whom we're all familiar - a little bit of Shane&Shane, some Shawn McDonald, a splash of Brandon Heath, and even some Amos Lee and Ray LaMontagne. You can see he's already shaping up to be quite the talent.

Finally, we figure it out. Jimmy Needham. The CD that was playing was his third album, Not Without Love. There is one captivating spoken song on there, the title song, that tells of the freedom we find only in God's love. We both bought the CD right away, and since then, I've been listening to the pure truths God speaks through Jimmy.

Really, you should go check him out.

God's promises

In preparing for d-group this past week, I came across a chapter of the Bible that I know I've read before, but the Lord brought to light a whole new meaning in his words. May I share with you what he's teaching me?

The girls have requested topical lessons. The first week was trust. To be honest, I did the typical Leigh thing and waited until Monday night to really work on the lesson for Tuesday night. I prayed for God to move despite my procrastination. He is so faithful.

I worked from Psalm 91. The Bible I usually use is in the English Standard Version, but I'm going to quote my New King James Version for this.

Bear with me. It's only 16 verses.

1. He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty

2. I will say of the Lord, "He is my refuge and my fortress; My God, in Him I will trust."

3. Surely He shall deliver you from the snare of the fowler and from the perilous pestilence.

4. He shall cover you with His feathers, and under His wings you shall take refuge; His truth shall be your shield and buckler.

5. You shall not be afraid of the terror by night, nor of the arrow that flies by day,

6. Nor of the pestilence that walks in darkness, nor of the destruction that lays waste at noonday.

7. A thousand may fall at your side, and ten thousand at your right hand; but it shall not come near you.

8. Only with your eyes shall you look, and see the reward of the wicked.

9. Because you have made the Lord, who is my refuge, even the Most High, your dwelling place,

10. No evil shall befall you, nor shall any plague come near your dwelling;

11. For He shall give His angels charge over you, to keep you in all your ways.

12. In their hands they shall bear you up, lest you dash your foot against a stone.

13. You shall tread upon the lion and the cobra, the young lion and the serpent you shall trample underfoot.

14. "Because he has set his love upon Me, therefore I will deliver him; I will set him on high, because he has known My name.

15. He shall call upon Me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble; I will deliver him and honor him.

16. With long life I will satisfy him, and show him My salvation."

I don't know about you, but there are a few verses that jump out to me. First of all, in verse one it talks about dwelling in the Lord. To me, when I think about dwelling in something, naturally my mind goes to a sort of shelter (like in v. 2)... but if you think about the word dwell in a different sense, another meaning is emphasized. Dwell also means to think, speak, or write at length about, or to linger on. Not only should we make the Lord our refuge, but he should captivate our thoughts. He alone is worthy of our idle thoughts and every motivation of the mind.

In verses 5 and 6, David talks about the terror of the night and the pestilence that walks in darkness, the arrow that flies by day and the destruction at noonday. All of which we DON'T fear because we trust God. But what are each of those things? Those cloaked by night are like the uncertainties, that which we can't see, future plans, etc. Those in daylight are other afflictions we might bear, such as enemies, personal temptations, etc. But again - none of these things merit our worry or fear because God will deliver us, and His truth is our shield! Hallelujah!

Can you just look back to verse 11? He gives the angels charge over us, or as the ESV states, he commands his angels concerning us to guard us in all our ways. HOLY COW! Not only do we have the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords protecting us, but the angels have been commanded to guard us, too! We really do have guardian angels!

Finally, verses 14 through 16. Eight beautiful, eternal, enduring promises of God. Rest in these. Rest in these truths.

1. He WILL deliver us.

2. He WILL protect us.

3. He WILL answer us.

4. He WILL be with us in trouble.

5. He WILL rescue us.

6. He WILL honor us.

7. He WILL satisfy us.

8. He WILL show us salvation.

Now, these are from the ESV translation, but God's word is the same. God is so eager to bless us. He wants to reward us and fulfill his promises to us! He is a loving God, and when we realize that we will never be satisfied unless He is most and we are least, the blessings abound! And no matter what version you read, you should note that it NEVER says, he might deliver us, if he feels like it or if his week has been alright or if he draws our names out of a hat. It says that he WILL. These are his promises, to him who has set his love upon the Lord.

May the power of the divinely spoken Word wash over you today, and may you find peace in his promises for you!

A Thought

Delighting in God is not a mere preference or option in life; it is our joyful duty and should be the single passion of our lives.

My Heart Is Full

Do you ever have moments in your life when you temporarily disconnect yourself, take a step back, and just marvel at all that the Lord has blessed you with?

This weekend has been filled with those moments!

The past few weeks have been difficult, for a number of reasons, and my faith has been pushed and stretched. I can see how the Lord has been growing me through situations in my life and asking me to cast my burden on him. Not long ago he gave me Psalm 55 and called me to recklessly abandon myself and allow him, and nothing else, to sustain me.

Through these trying times, I still see His hand in my life. Ah, how awesome to intimately know the One, the only one, who will never forsake me! My heart erupts within me at the thought!

The past few days in my life have really been a testament to the Lord's faithfulness. In his word, God promises that we will never be tried beyond our ability, but he will provide a way for us to endure it. Some of the strength he's given me came in the form of precious time with friends, new and old, this weekend. Friends who are also earnestly seeking God and his glory. It was a much welcomed respite from recent troubles.

From Thursday night dinner and Passion with Emily and Jeanna, to a Flashforward party with Amy, Byrd, Chris, Taylor, Dustin, Mary Hester, Paul, and more; from Friday's geocaching adventures and a night of intimate worship at The Edge, to a Saturday of Auburn football with the Jumpsuit Guys; from time with my favorite family, Emily, Guy, Meredith, Hutch, and Kathleen Bess, to Sunday morning worship at AUMC and lunch with Brandon, Kevin, Garrett, Luke, and Chrisavi... it is so clear to me that God placed me in each situation by his divine will, so that I might be encouraged by the fellowship of other believers.

And you know, he is not finished with this current work in my life. Like Paul, in his letter to the Philippians, I am sure that the Lord, who has begun a good work in me, will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.

He has given me hope. Bring on the trials! I know that God is for me - who can triumph against me, now?

So to all my friends - thank you! Thank you for letting God use each of you minister to me in the simplest of ways.

May your week be filled with the hope of Christ, with rest in the knowledge of our victory in his name, and with abundant blessings! May your heart be open to all that the Lord is teaching you!